What the signs feel like
Aries: a charger that only works in a certain position
Taurus: the other 4 guys in Maroon 5 that no one knows
Gemini: overdosing on chicken nuggets
Cancer: an instagram post captioned “im so ugly in this” with no comments
Leo: america’s next top garbage can
Virgo: every preteen girl when Jamie Lynn Spears got pregnant and ruined Zoey 101
Libra: missing the clap in the Friends intro
Scorpio: the “i” that gets stepped on by the lamp from Pixar
Sagittarius: when you haven’t had your phone for a while and you expect a bunch of notifications and you have none
Capricorn: when you say something in a group message and no one answers
Aquarius: drowning in vodka
Pisces: that eraser that only makes things worse
