The Escapist

waiting4codot:

anti0ch:

lefting-leftaroo-ninja:

i-am-the-karkat-media-worldwide:

musicalhell:

systlin:

totohoy:

systlin:

kittyknowsthings:

thesylverlining:

the-macra:

why are there so many posts about asexuals being immune to sirens. people. sirens don’t lure you in with sex (necessarily). they sing about whatever it is that you want most. they could sing about mothman or cinnamon toast crunch and guess what then your asexual pirate is fucking dead

this is the only kind of ace discourse i ever want to see on my dash. the only kind. ever again. good job

Do you think the sirens would be grateful that they finally get some variety? 

“Oh my god we can finally just sing about pasta thank the fucking gods.” 

I’m not asexual but I’m fairly certain sirens would do a far better job luring me into the depths with a song about pasta rather than sex…

I mean. 

“WHAT THE FUCK STAY AWAY FROM THE ROCKS.”

“FUCKER THEY SAID THEY HAVE FETTUCCINE CARBONARA AND HOT GARLIC BREAD OVER THERE HANG ON BITCH.” 

This is true; Odysseus heard them promising him knowledge of the future.  So the next time you see artwork like this:

Remember those sultry naked chicks are saying “We’ll tell you the winning lotto numbers.”

Them: “We have unlimited wifi at incredible speeds~”
Me: *diving headfirst into the water*

I love this post

Them: hey man if you jump into the water you’ll fucking drown
Me: i’m all in baby

“Away with you!” I exclaimed, swinging an oar toward the unyielding siren

“Oh, but we have anything you could ever want,” she cooed. I shook my head.

“I want for nothing! There is nothing you could offer me!” The siren paused for a moment.

“Dank Memes,” she said, “The Dankest Memes you co–” Her sentence was cut short by my epic cannonball into the water.