Anonymous asked:
I identify as asexual and aromantic, but I'm afraid that this is not my real sexuality, that I'm just, how acephobes say, a "late bloomer", and this is a big struggle because asexuality describes perfectly how I feel, and also the idea of having sex and having a relationship makes me uncomfortable but I can't stop think about this. Help me please.
fuckyeahasexual answered:
Anxiety and depression and all the other things that come with doubting yourself are bad for your health. I think its far better to experiment with labels and be quote unquote “”wrong“” then it is to force yourself to be straight until proven otherwise. I think the shaming of this experimentation is a form of phobia then itself.
talking about 9/11 with white people is literally one of the most frustrating things ever because they won’t stop talking about their experiences (even if nothing happened to them personally), and when i, a middle eastern person, try to contribute to the conversation, i can’t get…
I might eventually go and edit this but
Likes can only go so far for artists. Artists may exclusively upload their artwork to tumblr, or don’t have the time to use other sites and prefer tumblr over deviantART due to its simplicity, but the tagging system can make it harder to navigate. Many artists on tumblr tag with high-traffic tags or use their own tags to prevent tag clogging which eventually become lost. That’s why it’s very important to reblog an artist’s work.
I’m not trying to push you to ruin your blog’s aesthetic or something, nor am I saying that “you must absolutely reblog your favourite artist’s work or you’re trash”, all I’m saying is if you truly want to support your favourite artist, instead of just liking their posts, try to reblog them once in a while. The more reblogs they receive, the more exposure/notes/followers they may receive, and it’s just one of the easiest ways to show you care about them.
*This does not mean to reblog unsourced artwork or works reuploaded to another person’s blog without permission (re:stolen). Nor does this mean to reblog artworks without the artist’s consent, even if this case is slim.
The thing about an anxiety disorder is that you know it is stupid. You know with all your heart that it wasn’t a big deal and that it should roll off of you. But that is where the disorder kicks in; Suddenly the small thing is very big and it keeps growing in your head, flooding your chest, and trying to escape from under your skin. You know with all of your heart that you’re being ridiculous and you hate every minute of it. The fact that many people don’t recognize or have patience for your illness only makes everything worse.
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Ten years of experience (via punkasspoet)
I once had a therapist tell me that having an anxiety disorder is like having a faulty alarm system wired up in your brain — instead of going off just when there’s danger (like it would for somebody without an anxiety disorder), it goes off all the time, over little things that don’t actually warrant an anxious response at all. It’s like one of those asshole smoke detectors that everyone’s dealt with at some point or another, the ones that go off whenever you turn on the oven or try to cook something on the stove — you can yell “OH MY GOD, I’M JUST BOILING WATER” all you want, but the stupid thing is going to blare on undeterred. That’s what having an anxiety disorder is like: it’s the smoke detector, and you’re the person on the ground yelling “SHUT UP, SHUT UP, THERE ISN’T ANY FUCKING FIRE.”
Under normal circumstances I don’t talk about my mental health stuff on the internet much — out of anxiety, actually, more than anything else — but I wanted to chime in here because I think this is something people really don’t understand about anxiety disorders. Friends: we know it’s irrational. We know we need to calm down, that things aren’t as bad as we think they are, that our reactions are making things worse than they need to be, that it’s all in our heads. We know. It’s what makes it all so incredibly infuriating, because in life you can just — you know, smack the smoke detector with a broom or take the batteries out or something. An anxiety disorder doesn’t work like that, though god, I wish it did; it requires years of work and active effort and (for some of us) medication to dial down our reactions, even when we know, right down to our bones, that our reactions are wrong.
If you’ve ever read that when someone is having an anxiety attack, it’s not helpful to say “Calm down” or “Stop panicking” or shit like that: this is why. We are saying that crap in our heads already, only we are saying it louder than you, and with more frustration and self-loathing, because we have been trying without success to calm down and stop panicking for the balance of our lives.
I know it can be exasperating to deal with someone with anxiety — boy, do I. I deal with an anxious personality every waking minute of every single day, and let me tell you there are times I want to smack myself with a broom, take out my batteries, and let my whole fucking house burn down. But the thing is, if you have someone in your life with anxiety and their shit is bugging the hell out of you, you have an option at your disposal that they don’t: you can walk away. And if you’re someone who gets frustrated by other people’s anxiety, who can’t be patient, whose very nature compels them to point out that it’s not a big deal and we need to calm down and we’re making it more than it is — that’s okay, everyone has shit they can’t deal with, but use that option. Walk away. Tune it out. Don’t pile on, because that’s actually so counterproductive to the goal of getting the calm, rational person you know out from beneath their anxiety. The more you say the things we’re already thinking (this is stupid, just shut up already, calm down, this isn’t a big deal, why can’t you calm down), the more we become convinced everything in our heads is true, and the longer it takes us to shut it down.
As always, the best way to be helpful to someone with any kind of mental illness is to ask them, ideally during a time when they are calm and in control: what can I do, what do you need, what should I avoid doing, is there anything that helps. But short of that, I can’t tell you how helpful it is to have people in my life that I know aren’t going to echo back at me the shit I’m already yelling at myself. So: try not to do that to people. That’s all we’re asking. Try not to.
(via gyzym)
oh wow was told the exact same thing though this doesn't target what you can do to work with it past that point you're not in danger you're okay you're *martin crieff voice* in control and once you tell that smoke detector that its a false alarm it cools down and you can think well I keep saying /you/ but in reality this is what works for me augh im rambling again anxiety important
It’s so freaking hard to talk about anything on Tumblr, isn’t it? It’s frustrating because those conversations were always one of my favorite parts of fandom. But in the last eight months, I’ve found myself staying silent in the face of the vigorous debates that rose in the…
I’m Not a Joke (No Soy Tu Chiste) is a campaign spreading awareness for the LGBTI community through art and design, created by Daniel Arzola (@Arzola_d) in light of the recent violent acts against the sexually diverse community in Venezuela and the World. It initially seeks to expand in the online community. If you’d like to share your opinion please do so via twitter using the hashtag #ImNotaJoke. Like my page on Facebook and share the posters to support the cause!
For every T-Shirt you buy, one dollar will be donated to the campaign
No, you don’t understand. It’s important to let people know from a young age that not wanting to have sex and never having sex are okay choices.
I didn’t know asexuality was a thing until I was 19. I went to doctors, I had blood tests and various examinations, I went to therapy.
Hell, I even got very, very drunk when I was in high school, and some dude convinced me to give him a hand job. My therapist told me I had to try things in an attempt to fix myself. Y’know, sort of like a very fucked up immersion therapy. But she was the professional, so I trusted her. So I grab his dick and within a minute I was in tears and literally ran away.
I did a lot of things because everyone from my family to doctors said there must be something wrong with me.
So, yes, it’s also important to let people know that experiencing sexual desire is also okay, and that consensual and healthy sex practices are okay. But don’t ignore asexuality in an attempt to further sex positive movements.
If you can’t think of a better way to explain your sex positive viewpoints than excluding asexuals and other non-sexual people, then you’re not trying hard enough.
so important sex is not life society makes me so angry this is not what I live for this is not what I want this is not what I want to hear about every day this is not the only thing that people are good for this is not the definition of a healthy relationship asexual important
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full.. The students responded with a unanimous ‘yes.’
The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand.The students laughed..
‘Now,’ said the professor as the laughter subsided, ‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things—-your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions—-and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.. The sand is everything else—-the small stuff.
‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ he continued, ‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and mow the lawn.
Take care of the golf balls first—-the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented. The professor smiled and said, ‘I’m glad you asked.’ The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.forever reblog
